Smash News
by Destiny Willowleaf
Summary: Two friends start writing the local newspaper. What's in store? Oh, just some world records, all truthful information, and things that make no sense whatsoever! got the idea from Warriorskitty375's The Smash Mansion Observer. Read it first, then this will make more sense.


**I was just reading Warriorcatgirl375's The Smash Mansion Observer. It's really funny, and then I got inspiration for this! Hope you enjoy!**

**By the way, in my own Smash Mansion Universe(SMU)**

One day in the Smash Mansion, Xenallia was hiding in a tree, while she and a couple of the other younger Smashers were playing Hide-and Seek. She had seen them pass underneath her twice already.

"Where are you?" Ness called.

"Please come out!" Nana said.

"I give up!" Kirby exclaimed, plopping down underneath the tree.

Xena giggled quietly. He was right underneath her, and didn't notice it! Before the puffball looked up, Xena climbed almost all the way to the top, hiding herself in the branches.

"Do you give up? Truthfully give up?" she shouted.

"WE DO!" the others shouted, meaning all of it.

Xena jumped out of the top of the tree, and landed perfectly on one foot.

"How-what-who?" Lucas said, confused.

"I was above Kirby when he sat down. You passed under me twice."

Ike then stuck his head outside. "Xena! Master Hand wants you to go to his office!" he shouted.

Xena bolted inside, hoping to get there as soon as possible.

When Xena arrived, her best friend, Thomas, was waiting for her.

"Thank you both for coming," Master Hand said. "I have called you because we need a newspaper. Now, DO NOT tell Pichu about this, or else she will be trying to make the paper lie."

"Why us?" Thomas asked.

"Because you are the only two that were not here with the first paper."

"Cool," Xena said. "When do we start?"

"NOW," Master Hand ordered, giving Thomas a camera and a notepad. Then he teleported the two children off to the newspaper office.

Xena hopped over to the computer. "Add an account," she mumbled. "Name is Galactic Friends, Password is starwarrior," She then turned to Thomas. "All stories are to be typed on the account Galactic Friends. Got it?"

"Yes. Should I go start collecting stories?"

"Yes please. No secrets, nothing with ketchup, and tell them we are going to hold a Cruel Alloy record match at 5:00pm tonight."

"Got it!" Thomas replied, then running off to get stories.

Thomas ran into Sonic first.

"Hi!" Thomas said. "Smash News will be hosting a Cruel Alloy record match at 5:00 tonight. Any stories?"

"Well, no stories from me. Sorry," Sonic replied to the young boy.

"That's okay!" Thomas said, racing off to find a story.

Later, he saw Pichu playing Quadruple Dutch Jump rope, and not getting hurt from it. Thomas then saw that there was a Triple Dutch Jump rope world record for 10 seconds.

Then, Pichu got smacked in the face by a rope, but continued on. Thomas was writing all of this down, and also taking pictures of her in hoping for a good story.

"That's 5 hours now of Quadruple! Amazing!" Popo said, distracting Pichu, and causing her to fall.

This is when Thomas walked up. Hey Pichu, does everyone know you jump rope?"

"Yes, why?"

"You just set a world record," Thomas simply replied. Pichu fainted of happiness.

"Was she really jumping for five hours?"

"Yes," Popo said, with Toony and Red nodding eagerly.

"Great! See you guys later," Thomas called, as he ran to get another story.

In the office, Xena was looking for a spare camera and notepad. "Ah ha!" she exclaimed, pulling out an extra camera. She found a journal underneath the computer. "Now to help Thomas!" she whispered to herself, making a note telling him she was also looking for stories to write.

Thomas had found another interesting story that most would think of as a lie; Olimar's Pikmin attacked Charizard!

"What happened here, Charizard?" Thomas asked the Pokemon.

"I was just standing around looking for Ivysaur because I wanted to battle her. Then, all these Pikmin come swarming around my tail, trying to put it out!" Charizard then started crying.

"Do you think that they were just trying to protect Olimar's gardens from going aflame?" Thomas suggested, pointing behind himself.

"Oh."

Xena had spread the news of the Alloy brawl coming up, and was hoping to get a story. She then saw Ike attempting to dance. "Ike?" she asked.

"What?" he said, still dancing.

"What in the name of NOVA are you doing?"

"Dancing, why?"

"You are completely failing at it."

"How so?"

"Um, maybe the fact that you are wearing a sombrero and holding a shotgun and eating chicken and while trying to do the Carmelldansen?"

"Oh," Ike said, setting the gun down and taking of the hat. He still ate the chicken."Now what?"

"Try this game," Xena replied, handing him Just Dance 4. Then she left. "Oh, wait! Would you mind if I said in the paper that you can't dance?"

"Do it!" Ike said.

"Thanks!" Then she left.

In the office, Thomas and Xena started typing the stories, when the 4:45 alarm went off.

"Thomas, keep typing. I'm going to ask/tell Master Hand if there can be a Cruel Alloy world record battle," Xena said, rushing off to tell the floating disembodied hand.

In MH's office, he was just relaxing when Xenallia came in.

"Can all the smashers have a Cruel Alloy match? They wanted to tell you, but were too scared," Xenallia said.

"Yes. I will set it up starting at the Highest Tier." MH then teleported all the smashers but Meta Knight were teleported to the Arena seats. Meta Knight was in the actual Arena.

"_Sweet. Time to BRAWL!_" he thought.

"START!" Crazy Hand shouted, throwing some Cruel Alloys into the stage.

Xenallia and Thomas were also up there. "And our first match starts! With Meta Knight, a mysterious warrior of Dreamland, Star Warrior until the end, ready to Brawl!" Xena announced. "With his personal record at 4, will he be able to beat it?" Just then, he sent one off the stage. Thomas tallied the defeat, then took a picture of MK attacking a blue Alloy. In the end, Meta got 5 Alloys, with the actual record being at 20, held by Nana and Popo. Hammers make a good team!

Next up was Olimar.

"Here's Olimar! With his own record being at none, can he get one?" Thomas announced. The two friends had switched, with Xena getting the camera ready for photos.

As Olimar prepared to fight, all the different kinds prepared to battle him. After 10 minutes, he was defeated by a red Alloy, after defeating 3.

The battles continued on, leaving Kirby the new champion, defeating 33 in all.

"Later tonight, the results will be posted into the new newspaper, Smash News! Until then, sit back, relax, or try to break a world record!" Thomas and Xena said simultaneously.

That night, the two friends were selling newspapers for 50 cents per paper.

Xena walked up to Lucario. "May I interest you in Smash News?" she asked the Poke'mon.

"Is this filled with lies?" he asked.

"Nope. Though some of it may seem untrue, there are no lies involved." The Poke'mon took a paper, and was surprised by the heading. "Ike can't Dance?"

"Bye!" she said, walking away.

On Thomas's side, he had already ran out of papers and had gotten $10 after selling his 20 newspapers, and headed back to the office.

"I think I know what to do with my cash," he muttered to himself, thinking about the best way to store it.

After working for an hour, she got all 20 of her papers, glad that everyone had bought one.

"_Finally! I can relax instead of running around!" _she thought.

Peach was scouring the newspaper for anything good. "Well, that's interesting!" she said, reading an article on how Charizard was attacked by Pikmin, and didn't realize they were just trying to keep Olimar's garden safe. As she read on, she saw that their was a poll for who should get their own column for people to ask advice to. They possible choices were Meta Knight, Ice climbers, Diddy Kong, Olimar, or Marth.

**That's right! I'm done with Chapter #1! **

**The poll may become real, or it might just be the characters in the story. NOT TELLING.**

**Will be updating Hawkfrost's Halloween today!**

**Counting these words, and all on this page, there are 1379 words.**


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